Vol Softball Hammers Miami (Ohio) 17-0 In Four And A Half Innings

By Cody McClure

Vol Softball has just beaten the absolute shit out of Miami (Ohio) today in the Knoxville Regional.

There’s really no other way to put it. It was 17-0 in the fourth inning and, thank God, ended shortly after that.

There will be no further update, as this game was literally impossible for the Lady Vols to lose.

Congrats on the W, gals. On to the next one.

If you clicked on this to read about the softball game, my apologies, as that’s all I’ve got for now.

More softball coverage to come as the games get bigger.

So go ahead and either click off of this or continue reading with the knowledge that I am going to spend the rest of this piece simply asking questions about Miami (Ohio) as a concept.

I don’t expect anyone to answer the questions, so basically I’m just talking to myself. These are random thoughts in my head.

But it’s Friday afternoon and I’ve already done my good work for the week.

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I’ve never really understood Miami (Ohio).

Where is Miami (Ohio)? Does it have any famous alumni?

Do they still call it Miami (Ohio) in Ohio? Or is it just known as “Miami” up there?

Like if Akron or Toledo is getting ready for a bus ride to play Miami (Ohio) and the driver has an itinerary, what does the itinerary say?

Does it say Miami (Ohio) even though obviously all of them know they are staying in Ohio for the trip?

Would (Ohio) be necessary there? Do the people of Ohio refer to Miami (Ohio) as Miami (Ohio)?

Because if you just put Miami on the itinerary and it’s a new bus driver who hasn’t been briefed on the details, perhaps that would create disappointment for him.

Dale thought he was going to see palm trees and instead he’s staying right there in bumfuck Ohio.

Or just think if the whole team sees the itinerary. Maybe it’s posted on the bulletin board next the Ball State shit talk tweets or whatever.

There could be mass confusion if you just put Miami on the itinerary.

Now, the seniors would probably know by then that Miami (Ohio) is in the conference so it probably wouldn’t affect them.

But the freshmen would definitely be rattled.

“Coach, thanks so much for scheduling Miami so I can see my grandmother in Hialeah.”

No, sorry about that son. We’re going somewhere much worse. But have you tried Bob Evans?

So on one hand, it feels weird to call it Miami (Ohio) in Ohio. But on the other hand, maybe it’s necessary.

Can it even be considered a real team if it has parentheses in the name?

Definitely something worth thinking about.

Have a good weekend.